Babywise.
DISCLAIMER: Please note when reading this post, that I do not in any way, shape or form judge the parenting styles or philosophies of anyone else. This is how Dave and I have chosen to do things, but that in NO way means that it's the best or even close to the only way. I believe that all parents are just trying to do their best, and whatever way they choose to do so is perfectly fine!
When I got pregnant, several of the lovely ladies I work with asked if I had heard of "Babywise", and if I was planning on doing it with my baby. Clearly, since my activities in the years prior had been hanging out with my friends and drinking cocktails, I had not. But a few months before Luke was due, I ordered the book online (for $3) and figured I would read it to see what all the fuss was about.
Basically, Babywise is a feeding/sleep schedule structured to get your baby to sleep through the night between 7 and 9 weeks. Here are a few of the main concepts so you're familiar:
1. The central concept is called parent directed feeding, or PDF. This basically means that parents should use a combination of watching the clock to feed and using your best judgement to decide if your baby should eat earlier than scheduled. This is in contrast to attachment parenting - where parents feed babies at every fuss, and clock directed feeding where parents do NOT feed their babies except at each scheduled time.
2. The goal is for you to structure your baby's eating habits so that they eat every 2.5 to 3.5 hours for the first few months. The time increases as they get older, obviously.
3. They should follow the pattern of eat/wake/sleep each feeding cycle. Each nap should be at least 1.5 hours long.
4. You should establish a "first feeding" every morning so the babies bodies get used to a consistent first feeding and schedule.
5. Babies should always be put down to sleep when they are awake.
6. They are fans of crying it out. They believe it's important for a well attached baby to be able to self- soothe and cry themselves to sleep if needed. Now, this does not mean let them cry if something is wrong, it's all about parental judgement.
Clearly there is much more detail, tips for every possible situation, and suggestions on how the schedule can be flexed when needed in the book. After reading it in its entirety, I thought it made a lot of sense. It set up a structure to the day, wasn't crazy in either parenting philosophy direction and allowed for parental judgement and flexibility. Dave read it as well, and agreed that it made sense.
Now, I know there are a lot of people out there that think Babywise IS crazy. However, I wanted an independent little guy who was comfortable not being attached to me at all times, and more so, I did not want to be breastfeeding around the clock! So we decided to give it a try. I would say I ended up actually giving it a 50% try, until yesterday. See below.
Since Luke was given fluids every 3 hours initially in the hospital, he was very easy to get to eat on the Babywise schedule of every 2.5/3.5 hours. A few times we had to hold him out with a pacifier and rocking, but no big deal there. After the first two weeks when literally all he did was sleep, ALL the time, I tried to start the eat/wake/sleep pattern, which got easier as he got older.
However, if he went straight to sleep after a feeding I didn't keep him up, since selfishly, I would usually get a long nap in as well. Then, at 3.5 weeks Luke started giving me 2 stretches of 4/5 hours of sleep a night. Usually 11 p.m. to 4 a.m and then again until around 8 a.m. Amazing. However the timing was not totally consistent since I was letting him drive the schedule. I didn't establish a first feeding, or diligently wake him up every three hours during the day since he would get a long nap in most afternoons as well. He was gaining weight and seemed fine, but when I checked, I was feeding him 1 time less a day than the minimum recommend for his age, so that concerned me a little.
Fast forward a week or two, and here we were at 7.5 weeks, and Luke hadn't really made any progress. In fact the past few nights it seemed like his sleeping stretches may have been getting a bit shorter at night. This confirmed to me that I needed to take control and insist he eat more during the day to ensure he was getting enough milk AND hopefully bump those sleep stretches back up. So, Dave and I decided to dust off the old Babywise book and give it an ACTUAL try. We decided 7 a.m. would be a good first feeding time, so yesterday morning I set my alarm and got him up to eat. I kept him on a 3 to 3.5 hour-ish schedule all day, and made sure he went down for a long enough nap each time. There were 2 instances where he had to cry it out - but I survived (and so did he). So far, so good!
I fed Luke his last feeding at 10 p.m. and Dave put him down around 11 p.m.after eating/burping. Then, he was up at 1:30 a.m. NOT good. I bitched about how terrible Babywise was to Dave and got up to feed Luke. I put him down around 2:30 or so and he slept until I woke him up at 7:15. GOOD. This let me feel like I slept mostly through the night with no interruptions. And, I think if I hadn't woken him up, he would have gone much longer. However, I can definitely see the importance of a consistent first feeding, especially since I will be going back to work in a few weeks and will need more structure in my days. So, one day in and already back to a solid five hours.
So far, we're sold. I'm excited to try tonight and see how it goes with another day of consistency under our belts. I'll let you know. I know you'll be holding your breath.
And now here is a picture of Luke in his sack pajamas, as a reward for reading this long, probably boring to most of you, post!
When I got pregnant, several of the lovely ladies I work with asked if I had heard of "Babywise", and if I was planning on doing it with my baby. Clearly, since my activities in the years prior had been hanging out with my friends and drinking cocktails, I had not. But a few months before Luke was due, I ordered the book online (for $3) and figured I would read it to see what all the fuss was about.
Basically, Babywise is a feeding/sleep schedule structured to get your baby to sleep through the night between 7 and 9 weeks. Here are a few of the main concepts so you're familiar:
1. The central concept is called parent directed feeding, or PDF. This basically means that parents should use a combination of watching the clock to feed and using your best judgement to decide if your baby should eat earlier than scheduled. This is in contrast to attachment parenting - where parents feed babies at every fuss, and clock directed feeding where parents do NOT feed their babies except at each scheduled time.
2. The goal is for you to structure your baby's eating habits so that they eat every 2.5 to 3.5 hours for the first few months. The time increases as they get older, obviously.
3. They should follow the pattern of eat/wake/sleep each feeding cycle. Each nap should be at least 1.5 hours long.
4. You should establish a "first feeding" every morning so the babies bodies get used to a consistent first feeding and schedule.
5. Babies should always be put down to sleep when they are awake.
6. They are fans of crying it out. They believe it's important for a well attached baby to be able to self- soothe and cry themselves to sleep if needed. Now, this does not mean let them cry if something is wrong, it's all about parental judgement.
Clearly there is much more detail, tips for every possible situation, and suggestions on how the schedule can be flexed when needed in the book. After reading it in its entirety, I thought it made a lot of sense. It set up a structure to the day, wasn't crazy in either parenting philosophy direction and allowed for parental judgement and flexibility. Dave read it as well, and agreed that it made sense.
Now, I know there are a lot of people out there that think Babywise IS crazy. However, I wanted an independent little guy who was comfortable not being attached to me at all times, and more so, I did not want to be breastfeeding around the clock! So we decided to give it a try. I would say I ended up actually giving it a 50% try, until yesterday. See below.
Since Luke was given fluids every 3 hours initially in the hospital, he was very easy to get to eat on the Babywise schedule of every 2.5/3.5 hours. A few times we had to hold him out with a pacifier and rocking, but no big deal there. After the first two weeks when literally all he did was sleep, ALL the time, I tried to start the eat/wake/sleep pattern, which got easier as he got older.
However, if he went straight to sleep after a feeding I didn't keep him up, since selfishly, I would usually get a long nap in as well. Then, at 3.5 weeks Luke started giving me 2 stretches of 4/5 hours of sleep a night. Usually 11 p.m. to 4 a.m and then again until around 8 a.m. Amazing. However the timing was not totally consistent since I was letting him drive the schedule. I didn't establish a first feeding, or diligently wake him up every three hours during the day since he would get a long nap in most afternoons as well. He was gaining weight and seemed fine, but when I checked, I was feeding him 1 time less a day than the minimum recommend for his age, so that concerned me a little.
Fast forward a week or two, and here we were at 7.5 weeks, and Luke hadn't really made any progress. In fact the past few nights it seemed like his sleeping stretches may have been getting a bit shorter at night. This confirmed to me that I needed to take control and insist he eat more during the day to ensure he was getting enough milk AND hopefully bump those sleep stretches back up. So, Dave and I decided to dust off the old Babywise book and give it an ACTUAL try. We decided 7 a.m. would be a good first feeding time, so yesterday morning I set my alarm and got him up to eat. I kept him on a 3 to 3.5 hour-ish schedule all day, and made sure he went down for a long enough nap each time. There were 2 instances where he had to cry it out - but I survived (and so did he). So far, so good!
I fed Luke his last feeding at 10 p.m. and Dave put him down around 11 p.m.after eating/burping. Then, he was up at 1:30 a.m. NOT good. I bitched about how terrible Babywise was to Dave and got up to feed Luke. I put him down around 2:30 or so and he slept until I woke him up at 7:15. GOOD. This let me feel like I slept mostly through the night with no interruptions. And, I think if I hadn't woken him up, he would have gone much longer. However, I can definitely see the importance of a consistent first feeding, especially since I will be going back to work in a few weeks and will need more structure in my days. So, one day in and already back to a solid five hours.
So far, we're sold. I'm excited to try tonight and see how it goes with another day of consistency under our belts. I'll let you know. I know you'll be holding your breath.
And now here is a picture of Luke in his sack pajamas, as a reward for reading this long, probably boring to most of you, post!
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